Top 10 Reasons Why a Swinger Should Not be President.

Last week we posted the “Top Ten Reasons Why A Swinger Should Be President“.  In the effort of fairness to the rest of the “vanilla” world we figured we should also consider some humorous objections that may surface should a swinger actually make it to the highest office.  So here they are:

10.)  White House tours would not only cost the $20 entry fee, but would also require citizens to sign up for a $200 membership which means they only have to pay $20 dollars should they come back again within the next three months.

9.)  Campaign commercials would have the faces blurred with a friendly note appearing at the end stating, “facial pics available upon request”.

8.)  Uzbekistan suddenly becomes the newest member of the “Axis of Evil” after its President wrongly assumes anal play is okay without disussing it first with the First Lady during playtime following a state dinner.

7.)  Nothing says “national security nightmare” more than the First Lady entering the wet T-shirt contest at Swingfest 2009!

6.)  Foreign policy goes to hell due to the fact the President and First Lady stop and whisper “yes” or “no” every time foreign dignitaries shake their hands.

5.)  Everyone easily guesses the presidential “swinger safe phrase” every time one of them utters, “the Eagle has not landed, repeat that, the Eagle has not fucking landed!!!”

4.)  Guantánamo Bay becomes re outfitted to house all couples that respond “no thanks” to the President and First Lady’s advances.

3.)  America loses all international respect after the President is spotted in assless chaps while attending a fetish ball in Las Vegas.

2.)  Hillary Clinton switches parties and joins the Christian Coalition after it is discovered that Bill Clinton has a profile as a Single Male on SDC using the screen name “Slick_ Willy”.

And the number one reason it would be a bad thing to have a swinger for President…..

1.)  Janet Reno naked…

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Thanks,
~Mr. Gentlenibbles