What if Ward and June Cleaver Were Swingers – Honesty
I had a random thought the other day. I have those quite often and am not totally sure if that is a good or bad thing. Nonetheless, my thought was how vastly the Lifestyle has improved Mrs. Gentlenibbles and my sex life. And by Mrs. Gentlenibbles and I, I mean just the sex between us at home alone like Ward and June Cleaver would have done it.
What if Ward and June Cleaver were swingers? They were the iconic moral American (fictitious) family. But what are some lessons they could have learned from the perverts next door, besides maybe pushing their beds together which no doubt would lead to a little more action.
Before entering the Lifestyle we had a good sex life, probably a great sex life if you measure it by “Vanilla” means, but it pales in comparison to the intensity of what we have on a regular basis since first sharing that Hot Tub with a couple of hotties three years ago and beginning our “Swinging” journey.
So I was thinking to myself, “Self, what made the change? What about the Lifestyle outside our private bedroom made things so great inside the bedroom?” Obviously, the fulfilment of fantasies plays a huge role on an ongoing basis which contributes to the excitement and intensity, but there are plenty of other factors that have made our bedroom grow from a “Hell Yeah” to a “HOLY SH*T, Bow chica bow yah”.
So I have decided to create a series of posts offering some tips for our vanilla friends, taken from our activities with our swinger friends. These are endeavors that I in my meager and humble opinion believe can improve the sex life of the most conservative of paramours.
So without any further adieux, let’s begin. The first tip is:
The absolute number one requirement for a great sex life between a husband and a wife is trust and good communication and the number one requirement for trust and good communication is honesty!
I know. I can hear it already. You are saying, “Who are you to say we are not being honest with each other?” Your right, I am nobody so don’t get upset but please read on.
Long before our Lifestyle adventures, I was an honest and loving husband. My wife and I were best friends and we talked about everything. Or did we?
My wife and I had been married for over ten years and yet in all that time I had never bothered to show her where my stash of porn was. And surely the fact I kept it in my hiking backpack in the Garage had nothing to do with me trying to keep that collection secret from her? She like many women had spent many years assuming her husband did not masturbate and he never looked at pornography.
On a side note……
Ladies, it is time you hear a couple of truths.
- All normal men masturbate! The only questions are how much they masturbate and what are they fantasizing about while they masturbate. Even highly traditional and conservative husbands masturbate, they usually just feel much more guilty about the activity after wiping up the evidence with an inside out sock!
- You should also know the chances that they are fantasizing about you while they masturbate is also quite low. It is not that they don’t love you. They do love you, that is why they choose to live their life with you. The fact they love you however does not make Halle Berry or that hottie down the street any less attractive or sexually stimulating!
Due to the culture of our country, our sexual desires and feelings are the final frontier of honesty for couples. Couples that share everything still tend to keep secrets in the bedroom.
Most healthy swingers, for all our perceived moral imperfections, have relationship honesty down pretty damn good. Not that we are better at honesty necessarily, but once we have discussed the taboo of swinging with our partner, we have pretty well annihilated those societal barriers that our vanilla friends keep bumping into.
So I challenge my vanilla friends with this. Are there any secrets you keep from your spouse? Why? Think how amazing it would be if you truly could talk to your spouse about anything!
Now, I realize there are plenty of relationships out there that would fall into serious jeopardy if all the sudden husbands and wives started sharing all their sexual fantasies. I strongly encourage some tact, thoughtfulness, and patience to be heavily used. If however, through a slow period of exploration, communication, and understanding a couple can not successfully navigate honesty, I would suggest there are probably some deeper relationship issues that need to be addressed.
So my vanilla friends, next time you feel things are lagging in the bedroom give gut level honesty a try!
One more side note…
Guys, believe it or not, most women masturbate too! Don’t let them fool you. Though on average they do it less often than men, they still enjoy a little self stimulation when the opportunity arises. This point serves no purposes other than the fact that I think women who masturbate and admit it are HOT!
Here is to hundreds or porn stashes being uncovered today!