BBB 2011 Review – Butts, Boobs, …..and Bust?
So “Bust” may be a little strong language for the title of this review of the 2011 edition of Butts, Boobs, and Boats, but considering all the factors it was quite a disappointment in comparison to years past.
Before I start, let me clarify a couple of things…
1.) We had an amazing weekend which is really what it is all about, right? The reason that did not help the review is because in large part that amazing time came from the company we brought with us and the fun we made ourselves.
2.) Please don’t get us wrong, the BBB Saturday event was a great time and party. The catch is, due to the reasons we will outline below I am not sure it really separated itself from the many local events that take place in various cities on a regular basis throughout the summer. If you live close to Austin, was it worth coming out… Sure! If you were traveling to attend the event I am not sure you got your moneys worth as any normal weekend in Vegas, Ft. Lauderdale, or Havasu would have probably been comparable.
So why are we whining?
Technically we are not whining, as we admitted to having a great time, but for the purposes of this article we do want to point out what we experienced.
Where the heck did everyone go?
Our biggest disappointment was the turnout this year. Obviously with boobs everywhere I was not going to waste my visual acumen on the counting of people to get an accurate count of the turnout, but I am quite comfortable in saying that the event had at most half the attendees that we saw in the last couple of years. To be honest it may have been closer to one fourth of the previous attendance.
In years past, we always brought our barge early to the party to make sure we got a good spot and were still amazed at the amount of bodies on the water by 10AM. This year, since we decided not to host a barge we did not arrive at the event until almost 11AM and were shocked to see only one barge and five boats on the water when we arrived.
Throughout the afternoon, the crowd definitely picked up, but I don’t believe we ever saw more than three barges at the event. In the past there have been as high as seven to ten of the large party barges. Of the three barges there was only one that looked to be anywhere close to capacity. The official “host” barge even appeared to be holding a relatively light crowd, but did have a live band this year which was a nice touch. I am not saying the band was good or that you could hear them from more than a few feet away, but we give an “A” for effort.
Personal boats were way down in number this year as well. In past years we have seen three to four giant rows of boats stretching the entire length of the shore, this year we would be optimistic to say there was even a solid single line of personal boats.
On a side note: Even with the small number of personal boats they did manage to block in one of the large party barges for several hours which provided quite a soap opera as the crew of the barge argued back and forth with the party goers on the small boats and local sheriff personnel.
So where were you? and why? If you have attended this event in the past and skipped it this year leave us a comment below and let us know why? We have really enjoyed this event in the past and are curious if it is going to survive?
About as vanilla as swinger gets
Another reason we felt this event lost a lot of its luster this year, is that the whole thing felt very vanilla. This year the pre and after party where both held on Sixth Street in Austin. The pre party was actually not an event at all as party goers were just encouraged to visit any one of several selected bars on Sixth Street that were packed full of college students from the University of Texas just up the street.
Sixth Street is a great place to go and definitely put it on your beer drinking “bucket list”, but the environment made it virtually impossible to meet other Lifestylers which in our mind is one of the main attractions of events like this. Secondly, flirting (which is beautifully rampant at swinger parties) can be quite dangerous in a bar full of young, heavily testosterone’d, insanely jealous, and punch happy college kids. When the Swinger and Vanilla crowds mix the atmosphere always defaults to vanilla (except for possibly Mardi Gras, Carnival, and a couple of other flirtatious phenomenon)
Nothing wrong with a good vanilla party with sexy people, but as most of you will agree a good swinger party with sexy people is so much better!
The after party was definitely better, as the organizers at least settled on a single bar called Pure in the heart of sixth street. Pure is a fun bar and we loved the DJ playing everything from “old school” to “this week” music. Our only disappointment for the after party was evidently they had trouble filling the club, because when we were leaving we saw the bouncers advertising the “swingers” party (supposedly private to lifestyle couples only) to a line of young college boys eager to pay the $75 dollars (Entry fee for single males) to mingle with a bunch of swingers! Reread our comment on the intermingling of college boys and swingers above to see why this could be an issue.
Money is the root of all evil
Over the last couple of years we have seen this event become more heavily monetized as a profit generating event versus a great party that can generate some cash. I am all for the organizers making some money, as God bless we know they must work incredibly hard putting this shindig together and deserve to be compensated for their time and effort, but we can’t help but feel the ‘dash for cash’ is harming the event.
The pre and after parties seem to be aimed solely at bars and clubs that give the biggest payout to the organizers versus venues that make the most “swinger” sense. For instance we paid $32 dollars a couple to get in a Pure nightclub that on any other Saturday would have no cover and 25 cent drinks. (according to the radio ad we heard on the way to the club)
It was also quite interesting that we did not pay Pure nightclub to enter the door, but a couple representing the organizers filling a box with cash. That being said, I have no complaints with the $32 dollars as we all would agree that is a cheap date as far as the Lifestyle goes. My point is, I would have gladly paid $75 if the party was truly a private party for swingers only instead of the free for all for whoever had cash in hand.
Another side note: I was also quite surprised to see that the organizers had people attaching their banners to all the boats on the water. We swam back up to our rented pontoon boat for drink refills only to find a BBB banner attached with zip ties to its rails. This was not a terribly big deal, but it did make me curious what they would have thought if I would have slapped a banner of Mrs. G’s sexy ass on their boat advertising gentlenibbles.com.
Ok, after reading the above again I can’t help but feel like a bit of “douche” (as my son would say) with way to harsh a review of a great party. So let me spend a few lines here telling you about what makes this event so special.
- If you have never partied naked to half naked in a large body of water with a group of swingers numbering greater than a couple of hundred you may as well enter a convent. There is not a party in any club in the world that can provide the same energy as that many sexy people flirting and flaunting in the Water. Think about the greatest “pool party” you have ever been to and then multiply that by the coolest nightclub you have ever attended. That is what a giant Lake or Water party provides, and BBB in the past has been one of the great ones!
- Austin is a great place for an event like this. The overwhelming conservatism of the state of Texas curbed with the liberal Mecca that is Austin makes for some of the friendliest swingers in the country, and a great place to visit.
- Lastly, have you seen Mrs. Gentlenibbles topless in a Bikini? I would travel to Mogadishu on hand rowed dingy to party with that hottie! Fortunately, I have connections which make this a much more obtainable goal!
In the long run, will we be back next year? Probably. Will we ever host a barge again? Not sure. Are we rooting like hell for this event to come back big next year? You bet your ass!
Are we wrong? What are your thoughts on the event? Leave a comment below and let us know!
~ your sunburned correspondent….